|
| |
Click to sync to your Palm:
Memo: Signs That You've Had Too Much Of The '90s
|
- You try to enter your password on the microwave.
- You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
- You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
- You e-mail your buddy who works at the desk next to you.
- You chat several times a day with a stranger from South America, but you
haven't spoken to your next door neighbor yet this year.
- You buy a computer and a week later it is out of date.
- Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that they do not have
e-mail addresses.
- You consider the U.S. Mail painfully slow and/or call it "snail
mail".
- Your idea of being organized is multiple colored post-it notes.
- You hear most of your jokes via email instead of in person.
- When you go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a
business manner.
- When you make phone calls from home, you accidentally insert a
"9" to get an outside line.
- You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different
companies.
- Your company's welcome sign is attached with Velcro.
- Your resume is on a diskette in your pocket.
- You really get excited about a 1.7% pay rise.
- You learn about your redundancy on the 11 o'clock news.
- Your biggest loss from a system crash was when you lost all of your best
jokes.
- Your supervisor doesn't have the ability to do your job.
- Contractors outnumber permanent staff and are more likely to get
long-service awards.
- Board members salaries are higher than all the Third World countries
annual budgets combined.
- It's dark when you drive to and from work, even in the summer.
- You know exactly how many days you've got left until you retire.
- Interviewees, despite not having the relevant knowledge or experience,
terminate the interview when told of the starting salary.
- You see a good looking, smart person and you know it must be a visitor.
- Free food left over from meetings is your staple diet.
- Your supervisor gets a brand-new state-of-the-art laptop with all the
latest features, while you have time to go for lunch while yours boots up.
- Being sick is defined as you can't walk or you're in hospital.
- You're already late on the assignment you just got.
- There's no money in the budget for the five permanent staff your
department is short of, but they can afford four full-time management
consultants advising your boss's boss on strategy.
- Vacation time is something you roll over to next year.
- Every week another brown collection envelope comes around because someone
you didn't even know worked there is leaving.
- Our relatives and family describe your job as "works with
computers".
- The only reason you recognize your kids is because their pictures are on
your desk.
- You only have makeup for fluorescent lighting.
- You read this entire list, and kept nodding and smiling.
- As you read this list, you think about forwarding it to your "friends
you send jokes to" e-mail group.
- It crosses your mind that your jokes group may have seen this list
already, but you don't have time to check so you forward it anyway.
|
| Back
to Jokes |
Back
Home |
| |
| This
page is: |
 |
|
Current Terror
Alert Level
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Why are
there no 'Not PC' books? |
|
